Thursday 25 June 2009

Weakness is my one true strength

Gonna do this quickly because I really want to go to bed, but I want to write this now or else I never will!

A lot has happened over the last year, much of which has confirmed to me that I am quite a weak person. I want go into it, but like most I face struggles, problems and insecurities.

I got a first in my degree, which I cannot attribute to my own talent and skill. Thinking back over many of my compositions, I cannot say that everything I did was exactly how I intended. I stopped, started, reworked many pieces, many times. For one composition I didn't sleep for around a day and a half because I decided to change it at the last minute. My last composition changed six times over the course a term. Yet they got good mark. The last one a first. Had I submitted any of the other work I was doing, I wouldn't have got a first.

I can only attribute this to God divine intervention. He has graceful blessed my work and guided me through it, for his glory. I am determined to fight my sinful nature to make my work for him and for his glory. Otherwise, in many cases, I deem it worthless. I want my work to bless people, and I want to glorify God through creativity and everything that goes with it.

Anyway, to weakness. I could not have achieved this without God. In fact, I could not have made it through university without God. If I didn't not have the hope and strength that God brings, I don't know what I would do.

A few friends and I met a homeless man tonight who needs help. Above all things he needs the grace of God in his life and the strength that comes with knowing God. If he were to accept that on his own he cannot make it, and in fact in his greatest weakness he can find his greatest strength in God. For him and for me, the moment we go it alone and think we can make it on our own is the times that we will loose my way. I can only pray that God is gracious and comes into this guys life.

The Bible talks of this a lot. In my eyes it is one of the cornerstones on my faith. My weakness is strength in God. God is all loving, just and powerful. To rely on and depend of his strength, essentially tapping into, well, you can't find that kind of strength on your own.

Psalms are built around the idea of being weak and crying out to God for strength.

Philippians 4:13 says "I can do everything through him who gives me strength".

2 Corinthians 12:8-10 says "Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong".

Like the guys in the psalms, like Paul, who did great things for God in his life, I am weak. I know am. I always will being many respects. BUt as long as I can find my strength in God, in many ways, my weakness is my greatest strength.

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